Cool dude ... yea rite!

All events and characters are fictious and any resemblance to real life is purely co-incidental!

Its Sunday again.... and i am up by 8!..damn sundays
Gotta exam!....another MOCK CAT...another day where I go write a exam and perform pathetically....IIM dream fading away....
I wished I had studied more during the week and specially yesterday....
NAhh... me too lazy!
Anyways, i drive dwn till the exam with only my icard and a HB pencil. I always borrow the sharpener and rubber...
Walk down the classroom and take the usual last bench!
This nice cute lookin chic comes in.
Class room is kindof full but always the back benches are mostly empty.
She cmes der and sits in the bench next to me...
Looks at me and smiles...
I give a controlled smile...:D...
She waves her hand towards me... i look...she makes an indication of something writing...
"Oh the poor babes didnt get a pencil... she needs a pencil..."
But there is a slight problem...I got only one pencil...
I act cool and look at her like things are under control...
I break my one pencil into two and move to give her the pointed part and ask for a sharpner from the dude sitting in front of me....
Wow hw cool right?!....
Well...had i paid more attention I should have realised that she was actually trying to indicate that she needed a sharpener and on mre close observation found that she had atleast 4 pencils wid her!...
I started talkin to the guy in frnt of me as if I knew him since childhood!...thanks fr the sharpener dude!
The girl was in a guffaw!...Didnt look at her but threw my side glance I could see white teeth shining!!!
I ROCK!


Peace!

Desperate Hearts...desperate hearts...its Amazing!!

These are the lyrics of the aerosmith song:-

sure tells a story....

I kept the right ones out
And let the wrong ones in
Had an angel of mercy to see me through all my sins
There were times in my life
When I was goin' insane
Tryin' to walk through
The pain
When I lost my grip
And I hit the floor
Yeah,I thought I could leave but couldn't get out the door
I was so sick and tired
Of livin' a lie
I was wishin that I
Would die


It's Amazing
With the blink of an eye you finally see the light
It's Amazing
When the moment arrives that you know you'll be alright
It's Amazing
And I'm sayin' a prayer for the desperate hearts tonight

That one last shot's a Permanent Vacation
And how high can you fly with broken wings?
Life's a journey not a destination
And I just can't tell just what tomorrow brings

You have to learn to crawl
Before you learn to walk
But I just couldn't listen to all that righteous talk, oh yeah
I was out on the street,
Just tryin' to survive
Scratchin' to stay
Alive

Desperate hearts, desperate hearts

Happy?

Are you happy?
What makes u happy...

If I was a millionaire, I would be happy!
If I had a beautiful sexy girl friend, I would be happy!
If I had the perfect body, I would be happy!
If only someone would understand me will I be happy!
If I get a great college,great job I would be happy!

So one day, I pass out from the best college,have a gr8 body,find someone who is beautiful and sexy. And yea, I am a millionaire!

I am supposed to be happy then rite!
I got what I wanted! ... I am happy...i am happy....
hell shit I am happy...I want more!.... There are people who got more than me!....
I wanna be better!....what I have now is nothing....there is so much more out there to grab!
Why settle for good, when u can have much better rite?!
Hey I am not sounding happy am I?
When will I be happy now?!

The gyaan starts now....
Well...
To be happy...the 'I' factor never comes.
Life is bigger. Life is bigger than you!( yes i knw the wrds are frm... REM losing my religion song)
The only time when anyone was happy was till when she/he was a year old.
Have you seen that smile on a child's face.
Its pure, its innocent, it is free,it has no pretence, it just expresses how that baby feels at that point of time.
It was so simple to get that smile, why all u did was make a funny face, that made the child 'happy' and it gave out the purest outcome of being happy...the smile!
He is happy,he is content,he needs nothing more.


So what am I getting at?...AM i the one who is gonna tell u how to be happy??....
I am no sage,i am no guru, I have not been to the himalayas... and I dont proclaim that I know the secret of happiness!
I am the regular normal pycho 22 year old guy who has just seen life from his point of view and guess who feels a lot more than others.
Yea I do feel... and I am pathetic at expressing it!...
So am 'I' happy...the answer is Nahh...not a chance!
The reason is that I am a human being!
We all are!...hence we all are not happy...

Saw this movie of Will Smith called Pursuit of Happiness....Its such a true story about everyones life....
No matter what you do...no matter how hard u try.... at some point of time you cant be happy...
Its such a weird thing....we have a million reasons to be happy in life and yet we remain sad for the fewest and the weirdest of all the reasons.

Well all I want to say is... the more u make ur life complex the more tough it becomes to be at peace with urself....the tougher it gets to be happy.
We humans have this urge,we have the greed...all we think is about ourselves...All we do is expect...
We expect from everyone...and therein lies the heart of all the misery.
Humans are endowed with so many emotions.
We are not capable of handling so many emotions....Life certainly would have been easier had we not had any emotions...

Am not saying that we shud not have any ambitions...that we shudnt aim high in life...
We shud be fierce...we shud compete...we shud try all our best....only thing is remain sane at the end of it... To be able to understand life even when u have reached where u wanted to be!
More than half of the people dont even have a clue what their destination is....

The best way to be happy is to forget about yourself.
Never think just only about yourself.
You are connected with so many other things...
Have u ever felt that joy when u helped someone...and the gratitude and the feeling of thankfulness the person gives u...the blessing that he showers on u........
the feeling that someone smiled becoz of u.... thats happiness!
To make someone at peace...to make his/her life more easier...to know the person is doing better because of u...that feeling...that inner nice calm soothing feeling is happiness.

Not to expect a thing back!...now this is the difficult part....and still remain happy is a very difficult thing to achieve....


It would be one heck of an achievement for someone to come up to this level...
I have been trying and have been failing miserably....
How can anyone not expect...how can anyone not feel!
Feelings and emotions is what is the cause!

Well I havent reached any conclusion even though i conclude this....Its an ongoing battle!
I am game for it!

Peace!

Backup....

ALways no matter what, have a backup.
Trust me it saves ur ass!
It saved mine

It just takes some extra time... but having a back up is a very good idea!!

Not just your code, always have a back up in life too coz shit happens!

Peace!

Life... unpredicatable

Long day in front of the PC. Massive code in front.F10 and F11 all going through my head.Eyes all hazy , I climb into the nice luxury bus of my company. Removing the tie and unbuttoning the collar button is such a relief!
Cannot wait to reach home and have mom's hot and fresh meal and dad's super salad.

Was sitting next to Manish. He had returned after a decent diwali break of 10 days from Pune and was seeing him at the end of the day today.
Looked a bit lost and after the initial crappy talk we always have, he just came up about his friend in Pune.
Said his friend had lost his entire family the day after Diwali. His mom,dad,brother, granny and grandpa were all in that car on which the entire tanker had collapsed. All had died on the spot.
Everything was quiete when he said that. Had a big gulping feeling and asked about who that guy was.
Manish went on about that guy for 10 minutes. Said he is a real nice dude , who had an amazing family.
His dad was really great. A bussinessman who spent and loved his son like crazy.
Had got him bikes,mobiles and computer ..anything he wanted. Always come down from Deljhi to visit him.
And now everything was like gone.
THe entire family had come down to Pune to celebrate Diwali with their son.
The next day they were to go Meerut. THey were going to the station when while overtaking a tanker and when they were parallel to it and at high speed, the tankers tyre gave way and the entire tanker fell on their car flat.
It sounded real horrific and I said it sounded a bit too incredible to be actually true.
But as fate would have it, that was what had actually happened. At that very instant of time, no sooner , no later did the tyre had to give way, the tanker had to collapse and on their very car.

I did not know Manish's friend but his entirely family was wiped out in an instant.
The previuos day they were laughing and enjoying and now its all bloody.
I did not know that person, yet I felt the deepest for that guy at that moment.
What can you say to a person like that now . That everything will be fine?... What can be fine now? That I understand how ou feel? Can anyone really understand what and how he feels.
A person who had been pampered and whom life had treated so well is suddenly left gasping for life.
I was just thinking, that how can life change so disasterously for a person.
I asked Manish where he was now and whats he doing.
I was really wondering whats keeping him alive.
For me, I live for my family. My whole existence , my whole purpose in my life is my family. If God forbid, such a creepy thing ever happens, I really dont know what would be the point of my existence.
He said that he was in Delhi and his girlfriend had flown down from Banglore to be with him.

I thanked God that he had a person left to care about him. Guess that girl must be his only source of inspiration or maybe not, but he had someone to be with, atleast for a while.

Life can be so extremely unpredictable. All of this what happened has actually appened to a person. His dad, his mom , his brother. God. How can anyone be so cruel.
It just makes you feel powerless. Makes you feel how much you love and care for your family.
Made me feel like going and telling my folks how much they all mean to me and I would rather die than anything else happen to them.

Its something you cant plan, cant be prepared for. The entire bus ride to the station was a heav load. But at the end of it, you cant control life.
Maybe there is something really special in store for that person to live and enjoy life for.
Hard to imagine but life is unpredicatable... Live every moment of it and I know it sounds real filmy and cliched but tell your family and show your folks that you love them and they mean the entire world to you!...

Peace!

The RAIT Experience -prt1

Note: All characters in this 'experience' are fictious. Any resemblance to reality is purely co-incidental!...

Hmmm...

Its the monsoon time, the results are out and pay time for us for getting decent marks in the HSC.
Yea we gotta go through those rounds at the VJTI for an admission into the "EEnngiineeeering".

Dads all over are real proud. Our son will be an engineer now. We'll do good. He will go to America then and then we will get so many offers from beautiful rich girls for my son's marriage. Ahh! A engineer.

Yea sure dad, I will brighten your name! Then suddenly Aamir Khan's pops in front and starts singing that creepy song of his in which he goes..... Papa kehte hai.... u know what.....

"Hmmm...Agnels Comp/IT or RAIT -Comps/IT....",dad goes .Thinking which is a better option.

"RAIT! RAIT! RAIT! RAIT!", i go along in my mind. No chance in hell am I going to spend 4 years in a JAIL!"
Had heard so much about RAIT since JC that this was the place I wanted to be!

I say with a very serious look," Dad, I think RAIT looks like a better option. For one its real close to the house. It has a very good infrastructure specially the computer labs and I heard has a good staff.I will be good there "

"Yea. But Agnels will keep you in control".

"Dad I am 18!, i know whats good and whats bad. In Agnels its going to be them telling me what to do, how to behave (how to shit as well i thought). It will not be good for my personal development dad. Besides you are the one who wanted me to be more independent. RAIT i think should be good.". Man did I say some heavy things or what!

"Ok.Ok. So RAIT comps should we take it now!"

Hell yea baby!...Take it take it....
"Yea. Its the best choice of all the alternatives we have got dad. We should take it I guess."

Paid the fees , had a nice lunch in a nice resturant with dad and was coming home with a feeling as if we have just won a war and returning home. RAIT baby, RAIT!!

The Mumbai Lifeline

Its a monday morning. The time shows 7:41 and some seconds ticking on.
The indicator is set to 7:39...There is a hush, there is a honk and people start gathering in all from all sides. Wonder where all of them were 10 seconds back. It was as if the Pied piper played his tune and all the rats came crawling out.
Well I am one of those rats!
Dressed in an impressive rich full sleeve Park Avenue blue shirt , some nice comfy trousers and those typical office goers black leathered bag with a clean shave,hair gelled and combed, smelling all musky with the cologne, I get prepared with all the other similar looking rats as me, to board what is called the lifeline of mumbai.
Trust me everyone in that first class department looks the same with the dress code being formal and yet rats is the word that best comes to my mind to describe them.
Crawling down from the stairs, the sides and from wherever my vision could go does everyone come out.
The train approaches and I say my usual prayer. People set their body position as athletes do when they are sprinting for the 100 m race. Tighten their belts , roll the sleeves,blow their noses(dunno wat for though!). The first class compartment approaches.
I peacefully board when the train is at a decent pace with just some thuds and bangs and some polite curses and stares.
Like hungry wolves people swarm in looking for food ,oops a seat i guess, and then like a dejected wet hen settle for the best available space for standing.
Well it would be appropriate to say they look for the available place to stand rather than for a seat which would be like water in the desert.
I scamper through and reach my best spot of the train, under the fan and where there is support for the back.
Roll my bag forward as if a woman protecting her breasts from hungry beasts but its all done for better manevauring around and not letting your bag go away from you when another gush of rats come in from the next station.
The air ventilation is pretty decent at this spot. Hey its the First Class!
With a feel in my pockets for my mobile and wallet once in with everthing set, my head phones on, the train honks and the journey begins.
You try to look around but really cannot see much except for the people hanging along in front of you.
If you look at the scene from a distant it looks like a kindergarden class being punished with its hands up for some reason.
Just pray everyday that none of the people who board my compartment do not forget to put on their deo's or watever that smells good. I sure dont ,for them and myself and expect the same from them!
The crowd is a mix of all age groups. But one thing among them apart from the dress code that is common is that all of them are pretty well off. Yet everyone chooses this means of transport to travel to their destinations.
Its funny to look at people who couldnt help but fall asleep. Its even funnier when they have no control over their heads. Its like crazy hand banging. With rock goin on in ur headphones its the funniest.
The train moves on from station to station. The minor stations pass by drawing in major crowds(rats!). The major station is on its way. Two stations previous to its coming, people start piling on the exitway. Kurla is the word.Sends a chill down the spine whenever I hear its name.Its like the entire universe wants to get down at this station. And be sure that you are not the one who doesnt want to get down at this station and you are not standing on the way. If you are on the way you surely will get out of the train with how much ever you resist! You will fly baby!

I had never thought I would ever be writing so much and that too on a topic like a train. But there is something into this. Some thing in this way of travelling that you experience. Not a experience everyone should experience but yeah surely a weird one!

Its the best way a person can reach his/her destination. Pollution free and traffic free.
Just wished the government would really do something about the manner in which people travel.
Hey we are not rats here that we deserve to travel like this. We are the major working force of the city and the country. We all can afford to take our vehicles till our destination, but be thankful we dont else what hell shall break loose on the road, God alone can help. Its a good thing that the government has made this means of transportation but atleast see through it that people travel like normal human beings.
Give the citizens a more respectable way of travelling cheap and fast. Else our country will surely loose out on the youth and the best brains to a more advanced and luxurious countries like the US or UK.
Please then dont say that we have been influenced by the west and dont give a damn about our country.

Peace!